A box of Fiddle-
Entire thing in one sitting the worst that can happen is you'll gain about a
quarter of a pound!
A diet is the modern-
of its blessings.
A diet is what you go on when not only can't you fit into the store'sdresses,
you can't fit into the dressing room.
A diet is when you have to go to some length to change your width.
A diet is when you watch what you eat and wish you could eat what you
watch.
Amazing! You just hang something in your closet for awhile and it shrinks
two sizes.
Blessed are they who hunger and thirst, for they are sticking to their diets.
Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells are forever.
Diet is 'Die' with a 't'.
Diets are for people who are thick and tired of it.
Diets are for women who not only kept their girlish figure but doubled it.
Eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.
For some, dieting is a weigh of life.
Forget health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
Forget love -
Give me a dozen heartbreaks...if you think it would help me lose one pound.
I am not a glutton -
I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian
I get enough exercise just pushing my luck and jumping to conclusions
I try to lose weight, but it keeps finding me.
If it isn't fattening, it isn't food!
If you fatten up the people around you, you will look thinner.
I'm not fat, I'm just short for my weight.
I'm on a 30-
It's not the minutes spent at the table that put on weight, it's the seconds.
It's something most of us do religiously: We eat what we want and pray we don't gain weight.
I've been on a constant diet for the last two decades. I've lost a total of
789 pounds. By all accounts, I should be hanging from a charm bracelet.
Most people gain weight by having intimate dinners for two ... alone.
My advice if you insist on slimming: Eat as much as you like-
swallow it.
Never eat more than you can lift.
No diet will remove all the fat from your body because the brain is entirely
fat. Without a brain, you might look good, but all you could do is run for
public office .
On a diet? Go to the paint store. You can get thinner there.
One guideline applies to fat and thin people alike: If you're thin, don't eat
fast. If you're fat, don't eat -
One mystery of life is how a two pound box of candy can make you gain
five pounds.
People go to Weight Watchers to learn their lessens.
Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the 'Titanic' who waved
off the dessert cart.
Sweets are the destiny that shape our ends.
The best way to lose weight is by skipping ... skipping snacks ... Skipping
desserts.
The biggest drawback to fasting for seven days is that it makes one weak.
The most fattening thing you can put in an ice cream sundae is a spoon.
The older you get the harder it is to lose weight, because by then your
body and your fat have become good friends.
The problem with curbing our appetites is that most of us do it at the drive
in window of McDonald's.
The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day
you're off it.
The toughest part of a diet isn't watching what you eat. It's watching what
other people eat.
Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.
When did my wild oats turn to prunes and all-
DIET QUIPS